Productive

It's about that time of the semester. Oh yes, finals week. I don't know, there's just something about finals week that gets me even more stressed than I am even though I've pretty much secured my standings in each class. The only thing I'm prolly scared of as of right now is my English paper on Othello because it determines whether or not I maintain my above 3.0 gpa. It's funny how I'm stressing off whether or not I get an A in that class when about a month ago, I was a step away from being dropped from all my classes. Good girl act? Nah, this little kitty has traded in the club for the library. At least for now...

Finals week also means I'm getting ready for my annual trip to see the parents in Vegas. About a year ago, I was crying because I did not want to leave the bay at all. Now, I'm pretty excited to just get away from all the stress building up. My mini getaway last weekend was cool, but I really need to leave to get some thinking done. I think stress has just become my new best friend. Like they say, "What doesn't kill you only makes you stronger." Some words I continue to live by.

Shit has definitely been building up in my life as far as school, work, family, and even my friends. I don't wanna say that everything is falling apart, because in reality, it's actually put me back together. I've slowly gotten to where I wanna be with school and everything but it's just a matter of keeping my focus on that as well as other aspects in my life.

Whether or not I do come back for the fall is completely up to me according to my parents. It's for me to decide whether or not I wanna keep running away form everything again or just grow up and deal. Whatever happens by the time vacay is over, I'm sure it's gonna change everything. Every single time I've been to Vegas, I'd come back in the fall and something would always be different. Hm, or maybe I'm just different. That should be interesting.

I think I'm gonna lay low in the meantime.

xoxo,

A

Patron, tequila

This week has been pretty good to me, I must say.

Recap;

Got to El Aye around 1230ish, 1:00 and chilled til the next day. Chill trip so far until the Glow in the Dark / Highlighter party. I damn sure wasn't expecting all of that. Ha. I just love how there's a different theme for each parlay. Started the night off by using the beer bong. I think I did pretty well for my first time. Shit comes at you hella fast, though. Mhm, I said it. 11 o' clockish and I was just playing some beer pong with some strangers and can I just say that I'm hella raw in beer pong? Left the garage because I was pretty tipsy off some beer and went inside to see hella people arriving. Chilled on the couch for a lil bit and next thing you know, BOOM. I was gone off that LTD. I don't think I've ever been that ova since that one night after NV. The party really felt like a dream because it was all dark and smokey, and everyone's face was just a blur. I remember just glancing at my phone to check the time, and I realized it was already 4. wtf. I seriously didn't want that night to end. The next day, we went to irvine to explore and then eat. Felt hella drained after that so we headed home.

Other that that, I've been doing pretty good with school. Went from C's to A's in all my classes, and i've actually caught up with all the homework. Jefferson School District is also willing to give me my job back as a P.E. Aide, that is if I'm able to come back for the fall semester.

I'm pretty excited about Vegas because that means laying by my pool all summer, mom's cooking, and no work or school. Oh, and my upcoming birthday, too. AHEM.

I really hope my parents let me come back for the fall, and hopefully they see that I'm doing better than in the past few months. Either way, it feels like a fresh new start for me.

<3

"I believe that everything happens for a reason. People change so that you can learn to let go, things go wrong so that you can appreciate them when they're right, you believe lies so you eventually learn to trust noone but yourself, and sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together."

I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best."

--Marilyn Monroe

Hop up out the bed..

turn my swag on. Yeahhhhh! I haven't been blogging for the past two days because I've been too busy with school. Yeah, school. It sucks to be suspended from work but in a weird way, I'm hella happy that I did because I've had time to really relax this whole week. I love the feeling of waking up and knowing that I don't have work. I also got to catch up with school, and I think I'm actually back on track. There's about 2 more weeks left of school plus finals week, and then I'm dunzoo.

This week has been a rollercoaster. I've had some highs and lows this week, as well as some events that are out of my control now. I've strengthen some friendships and some friendships are not as strong as they used to be. I've finally found that balance between school, work, and the nightlife. I've learned some lessons this week that I'll definitely carry on with me forever. I've learned that I can't always have it my way and change is gonna happen no matter what you do. I've learned to deal with change, and not to fear it because things are constantly changing. I just didn't think it would hit me this fast.


I'm so excited for summer vacay because that means I'll be going to Vegas soon and that I'm turning 20 soon ! I've definitely missed my family and the house, the pool, the outlets, the malls, ummm..Circus Circus? Ha. I can't wait to just relax and do nothing for a good month.

I just want to thank everyone who's been there for me these past weeks. I love all of you.

I forgot how it is to be sober.

Damn, I feel like I never go on this shit anymore. I guess I've just been THAT busy. Well, for all of you guys who have been wondering what I've been up to, here you go..

Thursday 4/16; Went to Glaskat w/ Lumz & Cece hella last minute just coz we're so used to partying from Thurs til Saturdays and occasionally Sundays. I wanted to go coz I haven't been to Glaskat in hella long. The last time I went was that for that whack ass Pajama party back in summer 08. I remember because that was the last club I went to before I saw my parents in Vegas for summer vacay. Man oh man, do I have so many memories of shit happening at he club. (: club was just chill but I'm glad I kind of got to pre-party before El Aye.

Friday; Chill ass day. Did some last minute shopping after school for SoCal. Day was going pretty good til I got rear ended by some dumb ass bitches. Can't believe they tried to blame that shit on me, too. People these days need to learn how to drive. Took them mother fuckas' info and then left to pick up my check & then to SoCal.

Saturday; The Weekenders + Randy got to SoCal around 12ish? We wanted to go to the club but it was kinna late so we just rested up. Had some of the most randomest convos that night and then woke up around 10ish? 11ish? Went to go shop for a lil bit at Tyler Mall & Victoria Gardens and ate at Kabuki's. Got home, got ready, got faded. LOL! Why everyone was matching & shit tho? Rolled up to this event that Sha invited us to. Apparently, our swag was different - according to some guy who sat at our table. Whatev, I guess it was a compliment. Shit waas chill, but the after party was intense. Of course, the Weekenders had the spotlight as usual.

Sunday; I'm assuming I passed out on the floor next to the fire place coz that's where I woke up? Went to go grab something to eat in my boxers, even though I didn't have much of an appetite. Got ready and headed back to the Bay by early afternoon. Played some funny games on the car ride home. I realized that it was 420 by that midnight so I stayed up for a midnight blunt.

Monday; Went to school, high. Went to work, high. Went to Randy's, got even more fucked up. Went to the beach with the girls and CB Tone & Randy and Krystal. Went back to the house and I was stuck like woah. Edibles fuck me up, foreal.

That was some weekend. I love my life, foreal.

I'm so ready for this weekend..

I feel like I'm high right now because I'm soo tired and I feel like can KO at anytime because I'm so fuckin tired from work.

Let's see, this weekend..I...partied w/ the weekenders. Shame on you, you should already know by now. Well lemme "elaborate on that" as Cece would usually say.

Thurs; My weekend started on Thursday. Didn't really know what to expect of that night when I woke but then Jency's texted me at 4 telling me to be ready in 4 hrs because we were going to Sac. Couldn't figure out what to wear but I just decided to go w/ my fave yellow dress. I swear, I always have a crackin ass time whenever I wear that dress. (: Fuckin had Kareoke night in the car during the ride there then started pre-gaming once we got to Empire. I must say that it's probably my new favorite venue, next to The Mist. Club went by hella fast, tho. Don't remember much from that night except for takin hella pictures and being in the cages. Went to IHop after we got back to the city then went home.

Friday; Woke up w/ hella bruised all over my bod. Guess you can say I had a fun night. Chilled at granny's house til Jency's bday dinner and ate offa everyone's plate. (: Headed to SJ after for John Ross's party and got pretty drunk, not fucked up but just enough. Left for San Leandro after that then chilled there for a lil bit til we went back home.

Saturday; Worked til 7. Got off and went straight home to start getting ready for Bikini Massive aka Jency&Dina's bday party. Took hella shots of Patron&Bacardi but didn't get fucked up to my surprise. I think that was probably the first night that I was the soberest one out of all of us. Haha. I still had fun. When do I not have fun?

Sunday; Called in sick because I was hella tired the nxt morning and was running on 3 hrs of sleep. Luckily, the computers were down so they sent everyone home anyways. Stayed at home all day while everyone spent Easter Sunday w/ their fams. I was kinna disappointed because I wanted to take Easter Bunny photos. "/ Finished our group proj for English then got picked up by Rod & kicked it w/ him for a bit. Watched Walk Hard&Requiem of a Dream at his new spot, zooted. Haha. The two best movies to watch when you're high. Well, I thought so last night.

I'm so ready for this weekend, tho.

zooooted.

My title explains it all. Honestly, I'm soo fucking high now..it's ridiculous.

Sunday; Woke up to Jency's text because she wanted to go to church. Went to the mall real quick then stopped by Ant's BBQ. That's how you know we're savs..we get drunk off patron in the daylight. Stopped by Best Buy then thought long&hard about what to do for her bday..so we decided to have a telly. Telly was fun. A good amount of people came thrugh and I was kinna buzzed. Hella remember waking up the next morning and going "fuck, I have work in 2 hrs." I really hate that feeling but at the same time I find it hella funny.

I've been doin good these past 3 days with work. I just love how my new job keeps me focused&on top of my shit. But so far, I love my new job.

I could live like this forever. Well, maybe not forever, but I mean..I could keep doing this for now. I love the way my life is going. I've got the best friends, the best parents, good grades, a good job, my weekenders..I think I'm good with where I am right now.